January 2010
24 posts
mental health break
saturday at the office
postprandial statements of fact
“My beard is about acquisition, not engagement.”
-Beller
apples and oranges
Jay: wow
Jay: where I’m from ipad is how people say ipod
Jay: this will be confusing
dispatches from the homestead
Subject: Unconditional L O V E Dearest Sanam, how are you is the life treating you well enough or not if not let Baba know who will try to put it right for you ! Sanam jaan ,please let us know how you are once awhile, we are worried about you.If you need anything just give us a call, Baba and Mimi always standby to help you. sorry for my broken English and poor typing. Love you for ever...
dispatches from the office
No, seriously. Don’t.
a decade of friendship, distilled
An email from Drew, currently wandering around New Zealand.
You’ll be happy to know that there is a bird here, the tui, that makes a noise like a squeaking gate and has what looks like balls hanging from its neck. Kiwi love, D
this is my coworker ayca
I’m still not entirely sure how her picture ended up on the front page of the Onion.
Thing that makes the story confusing: she actually called in sick today.
things that make 6:00am okay
“Please watch your step as you exit the train. And don’t forget to have a beautiful day, and a warm, adventurous weekend.”
—Subway conductor
notable moments
“Somewhere around here looks like a fetus.”
-Katie
three potato four
Photo by Dash Snow
Sleep with New York, murder San Francisco, marry Boston.
it's gonna be a good day.
I can tell already.
pointless observation of the day
Substituting the word “fapper” for “rapper” makes Lil Wayne songs more entertaining.
the durable mike malloy
How do you kill an indestructible man?
Antifreeze was substituted for liquor, but still, Malloy would drink until he passed out, woke up, and came back for more. Antifreeze was substituted with turpentine, followed by horse liniment, and finally mixed in rat poison. Still, Malloy lived.
The group then tried raw oysters soaked in methanol.
Then came a sandwich of spoiled sardines, carpet...
meüble
Dream Captcha, via Swissmiss
they are young, young ones can try anything
Today’s obsession: the Official Playboy Bunny Handbook from the 1960’s.
Did you know that an unkempt tail is 5 demerits?
Better keep that ish fluffed. [LINK]
speaking of the davenports
I took the train to Great Neck today for my cousin’s baby shower. It was my first invitation to a baby shower as an adult, held for someone my own age — which made me feel the types of emotions that people usually resolve by drinking. I also accidentally showed more cleavage than I meant to.
I originally took this photo as an example of my aunt’s Bathroom of Insanity, but...
HEY BLOG GUESS WHAT
This just made my life, realistically, at least 6% better.
2 tags
New Segment: Texts From Nate
I was awoken this morning by a text message from Nate, who just started his new job in Compton.
Nate: There’s barbed wire surrounding my work with garbage stuck in it. I’m not sure if it’s meant to keep people out or keep us in.
Me: You need a blog for these things, dude.
Nate: What would I blog about? Things that get stuck in the wire?
in which the US government demands things of me
fucktastics
Advertising is destroying society, according to a new report from thinktank the New Economics Foundation.
The report, which compares the impact on society of groups of people doing six different jobs, concludes that advertising “can create insatiable aspirations, fuelling feelings of dissatisfaction, inadequacy and stress” among the population. It concludes that ad executives, which...
but I'll be hood forever
I’m back! And guess what you guys, China totally sucks.
But thankfully, the holidays weren’t a total wash. After two exhausting weeks of stir-fried cat ears and toilet holes, I was rewarded with five days in SF for New Year’s. An epic convergence of East Coast friends, UCSB friends, and childhood friends, all in town at the same time.
The result was days like the one pictured...